We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize