would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Randomize
