went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
