I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize