Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I want to be your penis for a week.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
