that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
