Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry nogrity hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(503): View more from Oregon

Me too!

Fav 34 988 1528
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions

(617): View more from Massachusetts

you want 1 or 2 eggos?

Fav 2 2244 820
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(828): View more from North Carolina

I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.

Fav 17 2874 915
share tweet
(516): View more from New York

and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.

Fav 13 5835 1456
share tweet
(781): View more from Massachusetts

She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."

Fav 3 2263 1403
share tweet
(347): View more from New York

He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?

Fav 10 891 2606
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(207): View more from Maine

I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.

Fav 11 1657 714
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

Whore are you.

(301): View more from Maryland

Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?

(202): View more from Washington, DC

Yes.

Fav 3 1932 672
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(208): View more from Idaho

Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.

Fav 0 69 15
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT