So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I need to calm my uterus...
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
