Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
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