I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
