oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
