His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
