Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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