garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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