Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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