You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
