if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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