Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
