My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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