Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
