it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
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