is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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