ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
