i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize