I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
