My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
