no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
this is an emotional support booty call
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
