Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
