ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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