i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
