I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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