We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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