We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
