I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
