I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
