he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
