I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
