Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
