I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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