Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
sex in a hospital.. check
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