i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
