Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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