I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
