She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
