either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Randomize
