I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
