I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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