well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
