We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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