we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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