can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
